I feel like I've been talking all day--maybe because I pretty much have been. First, Orange and I had a lovely lunch in this hip joint; she had the Bliss cakes (with peaches and sour cherries) and I had a spectacular grilled cheese with apple and onion. I walked over there from my place, through the snow, and actually quite liked the walk. From there I walked to a hip coffee shop to see Lole before he takes off on a cruise ship--the QE2, no less! He's working the South Pacific leg of the QE2's last year on the high seas; he'll get off in Sydney, Australia and fly back here. He's not getting paid for it, but he doesn't have to pay, either. We hung out for a good three hours, then got on the el, together, because he lives near the place where I met Chuck for dinner.
As I mentioned here, i was a little . . . nervous is too strong, but we'll go with it, about this, but it was actually quite nice. We're sort of tip-toeing around, trying to figure out if we can be friends. At this point, i think we'd both answer that question with a tentative yes. I mean, we're not going to be spending hours hanging out all the time, or even see each other without CK more than occasionally, I think, but what the hell. He's making some big strides, continuing doing the hard work he needs to do to be where he wants to be--and, after all, I know a lot about the struggle, and I know a lot about the challenges he faces.
So we'll continue with the baby steps, most likely. The thing that I like, on my end of this, is my decision to let go of as much of the anger and resentment as I could. I suppose I could still work up a good rant, but why? What happened is in the past, and I can't change it, and neither can he. I don't feel like carrying that around with me, and it's nice to not have to do that.
Okay, I probably would write more, but I keep finding myself sitting here staring into space, so I suspect the chamomile tea is having its way with me. Besides, I have to rest up and meet the Tart for breakfast tomorrow--more good food in good company!
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3 comments:
You seemed to have joined The Other Half, and you are living like them.
You mean the people who don't work 70 hours a week and who have something resembling a life? I know; I've lived in this neighborhood for a year and a half, and I know almost nothing about it, because I've been so occupied.
Yay for letting anger dissolve! Thich Nhat Hanh would be happy.
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